Indepen-dance

Independence can be a very personal thing. One person's slavery is another person's freedom in possession. Believe it or not, all people like to be owned. It's a very safe way to live. The only difference between anyone is the point where you draw that personal line in the sand and say "I would do anything for love, but I won't do that..." (thank you Meatball!) That line is where you dance, proclaiming your independence from ________. Fill in the blank with whatever "that" you won't do. Me? I've railed against all kinds of things in my misbegotten youth: The Man, conventional thinking, western medicine, you name it. In the last year, I have focused on one simple thing to fill in that blank.
Fear.
I have declared my independence from fear.
I've heard the advise that you should do one thing a day that scares you. While not quite going to that level, I've come pretty damn close. I've done things and had things done to me in the last year that I was so afraid of I couldn't even think about them without having a panic attack. I won't bore you with the stupidly mundane, but i will give the short list:
Dentist-haven't been for twenty years. Had my first cleaning and partial root canal this week. Didn't pass out even once.
Airsoft-Joined a group of uber-testosteroned young men and shot at each other, sometimes drawing blood, twice a month for a year. Even joined a team and played at an invitational.
People-I'm awkward. Raised by wolves. Can't have a conversation without inserting foot deeply in mouth. I've talked to more people and made more contacts this last year than ever before. Didn't get my house TP'd once.
Just Did It-Started and am on my way to finishing my first book. Learned how the mower works. Shaved my dog. Many many things I would have put off indefinitely, I did. Without thinking it to death. FBI still not taking away my birthday.

I know that all of this is just the beginning, and I'm both tired and glad. May the good times roll, and the force be with me.
And you.